Day 1

I guess it says a lot about my usual eating and dehydration habits when I say: I don't feel that weird today.

My biggest problem so far has been quite psychological, really. I keep thinking, 'How am I going to pass the time without eating?' It's weird, because I don't typically devote much time to eating in the first place. But not eating at all? It's crazy talk. Not to mention not drinking or smoking... The weirder thing is that I have the strange recurring thought that I can fill up my time with... dancing. I'm not sure where in my completely repressed psyche that's coming from.

So anyway, the tea wasn't so bad last night. My stomach woke me up, as I was expecting, but the results weren't terribly gruesome or graphic. I can't say I wasn't a little disappointed. I wanted to start things with a bang.

I waited until this evening to do the Salt Water Flush, since I had to work today and wasn't sure how it would rear its ugly head. I mixed it up as soon as I got home (after stopping off to buy toilet paper, as we were out, ironically). The SWF (as the folks on the forums like to call it) is horribly disgusting to drink. Brackish really does evoke the correct image. I downed three-fourths of it in between gags and almost-pukes, and that's all I could stomach. I figure three-fourths is much better than two-thirds, and two-thirds is much better than one-half, and one-half is significantly better than a third, and a third is significantly better than one-fourth... etc. And this exact line of thinking (except in reverse order) was how I convinced myself to accept swallow after nasty swallow. I found that simple fractions seemed to keep my mind and gag reflexes distracted three-fourths of enough. Tomorrow I will try the quadratic formula.

Then I sat down to finish watching Enron: The Smartest Guys in the Room. I have to say, there's nothing like watching a bunch of ethically deficient evil business folks to help speed up the process of shooting large amounts of liquids out of one's anus.

So I guess that's about it for today. I'm just sitting here twiddling my thumbs and not ingesting anything. Perhaps I'll go sit in the sauna at the gym, as the coffeehouse is out of the question.

Oh wait. I did read an amusing little article today on a blog called The Faddist. This guy decided that perhaps ingesting 600 of anything liquidy would achieve the same Master Cleanse results. I can't say the thought didn't cross my mind.