Email Spam Haiku

Constructed from spam email subject lines:

Stiff risen like cliff
Your manhood's activity
Tear her ham wallet

Uh, I have never heard the term 'ham wallet' before... but it's somehow... appropriate?

Tom Glavine's Back!

After five years away from home, Tom Glavine's going back to the Braves. He turned down a $13 million contract with the Mets and opted for $8 million with the Braves and a $3 million buyout.

According to my mom (trusted Braves news source) he told the press he didn't think he was worth the $13 million. At first, the comment brought about warm tinglies, but of course then I thought about how much $5 million really is... Plus, he is 41 years old.

Anyway, I'm glad he's back. Now they need to work on my baby Greg Maddux. Then I will be at peace again.

E.A.S.T.

I did the East Austin Studio Tour this afternoon. Once we got going, I realized that I should have gone by some studios yesterday, as well, but we were busy getting ready for my birthday party last night. We only made it to four places, each of which featured several different artists.

The Bearded Lady screen printing shop was really interesting. I picked up a few free posters and some super cheap t-shirts. The Pump Project Art Complex was loaded with cool artists. Amber Kappes had some great realistic portraits in oils. Another painter, J.Haley, had the greatest picture on his studio door... It was a pic of a painting that read, 'In order to clarify the objective and resolve ambiguity, the painter became a writer.' That was my favorite piece. The words were painted with little attention to composition on top of an abstract painting. Perfect.

My favorite work of the tour was from Debra Broz. She did a lot of pieces with found art books. In one, she went through the entire first half with a pen and covered up all of the words except occurrences of the words 'art' and 'artist'. I didn't have too much time to linger, but I would have liked to talk to her a bit.

Next time, I'll got on Saturday, too.

Herman the Giant Bunny... Continued

So Herman the giant German bunny has a myspace page. Listed as one of his favorite books is The Unbearable Lightness of Being, which, being a personal favorite of my own, made me quite happy. He lists 'being cuddled' and 'having his toes tickled' as some of his favorite activities. He also plays bridge on Thursdays. Who knew? Good old Herman. I wish he didn't live in Berlin, as I would ask him over to snuggle and read Milan Kundera. Alas, I'll have to settle for The Real Man and the real man.

Stephin Merritt on NPR

On NPR yesterday, they had a pretty neat segment on All Things Considered. They put Stephin Merritt in a room with a bunch of recording equipment and gave him two days to write a song. They showed him a few pictures for inspiration, and then they filmed the whole thing. You can hear the song, A Man of a Million Faces, on the website, and you can watch a time-lapse video of the whole process.

Man, I sure do love that guy.

Vegan Diet = No Cramps

Since finishing the Master Cleanse, I've stopped eating all meat and dairy products except for fish. I've felt a lot better and lost a little bit of weight, and my skin has cleared up quite nicely.

Earlier this week, I stumbled upon yet another benefit of the vegan diet: no menstrual cramps. None. Not even a little.

Typically, I at least have one crappy crampy day every month. It's rarely excruciatingly horrible, but it's usually pretty uncomfortable and annoying. However, this month, I had zero symptoms. No cramps at all. I figured it might be a result of the diet changes, and I found this article.

In short, researchers found that women on a low fat, high fiber vegan diet reported fewer and less intense cramps than those on a non-restricted diet. Apparently the reduced fat keeps the body from producing as much excess estrogen, which is the crampy culprit. And, the extra fiber helps flush out any excess amounts that are created. The vegan diet participants were not allowed to eat avocados or peanut butter, but I've been eating a fair amount of both and seem to have achieved the same results.

Apparently, participants in the study also reported fewer concentration problems. as well, but I'm still waiting for that to kick in.

Botanicalls

Botanicalls